How Much Should One Practice?
I get this question a lot but honestly I try really hard not to give a rigid answer. Every student is different, every family dynamic is unique and I never want to cause a student to feel shame or negativity around learning music. With that said, I can tell you that students that don’t practice at home between the weekly lessons are unable to build the skills that are required to read music and play the piano confidently. The only question I ask is whether the student is learning and growing as a musician and enjoying the process. Without having the skills to play with ease regularly, lessons aren’t as much fun and don’t end up providing the student with a positive experience.
I reached out to some families that I’ve worked with over many years of teaching that I could tell had a system that supported the student in learning piano that in turn allowed the student to flourish and leave my studio with the skills to play for a lifetime. I asked these families four questions to help guide parents of new students. I hope these shares are helpful for your family to bring music into your home for the long term. They were shared anonymously in a survey and are quoted word for word:
How would you describe what is required by parents to support students that are considering starting piano lessons?
- As with all extra activities, have to hold accountable to regular practice and working through challenges
- I think it kind of depends on how old your child is. My child was around 5 when she started. We chose to have her learn the piano. My guess is that this is the case with most parents of fairly young children. In this case, I think the parent or parents need to see their child through the process, i.e. be hands-on in a positive way, since it was the parent(s) choice to have them learn piano. Little children need guidance. Talk to the teacher about it so you’re on the same page as to expectations. Is your child also involved in sports or other activities? Are they able to take on another activity? Are you as a parent prepared to take the time and make the effort to help your child succeed at the piano? Piano lessons was one of the best things we did for our child. It requires commitment and patience but the rewards are worth it.
- Praise them for their practicing not for their accomplishment we are really proud of your hard work
- You have to invest a lot – time, resources, kid management. But, you want to avoid your kid feeling that. You want them to find the joy and satisfaction and not have it be something that their parent is making them do because it is “good for them”. I have found that praising their progress goes a long way. And… be patient and tenacious. Keep in mind, however, that your kid also has to have some investment in it.
- Make sure that the student is the one interested in music and lessons, if so, then make sure to set up a structure in their lives to meet the rigors of tackling such a feat. This can be an amazing experience and accomplishment for them, with skills and disciplines that they will carry on with them for the rest of their lives.
- Positive reinforcement, being present with their child, and being “involved and interested” is crucial to their child’s success.
- Everyone has to be on board and understand that practice is a vital part. Baby steps!
- A mountain of patience and a mountain range of empathy. I think it helps a lot when I sit down and play his pieces just for fun. . .it lets him know that he’s not alone in the venture.
What other advice would you give parents new to piano lessons?
- The importance of daily practice can’t be minimized
- Even if you don’t play an instrument, try to keep up with what your child is learning, or at least show an interest in where they are in the process and how they feel about it. It should be fun for them, not a chore. Let them show you what they’re learning—sit down with them and listen to their playing. Be part of the process in a quiet way. As in any situation, children thrive when they know they’re being supported. Don’t be judgmental!
- I think in the end it’s really up to the student to motivate to practice.
- Patience – ask your child questions about what is motivating to them and try those things out. Don’t let piano become a power struggle – then it becomes about the power struggle and not about the piano at all. “Ok, if now isn’t a good time, then when would you suggest?” and then hold them to that.
- It can seem like learning a new language and seem overwhelming. Just remember that your student will build on each little activity, as similar to playing with building blocks, eventually they will have a structure available to them to accomplish many feats.
- Piano practice should be part of a daily schedule….so scheduling is important, especially if there are sports and homework to contend with. He usually practiced right after school or right after his homework as a “routine”. It was as routine as “brushing teeth”!
- I made a chart for my child each week. The first column listed the exercise they had to do. Some should be fun. Like clap the rhythm of the song while singing. Maybe another is to play a new measure 5 times, the first time super slow, and then a little faster each time. These little exercises help achieve quick wins and students feel that their efforts will lead to success. Then there were six additional columns to check each day of the week that they did the exercise. We didn’t practice on lesson days. Try to make it fun and encouraging. Sing along. Celebrate small wins.
- Don’t let them quit. We phrase it in our house as something that we just do – like going to school. Try to not make it punitive – and I know this is hard – but we’ve had combative sessions where it probably felt like punishment to practice. I try to avoid that at all costs. I, frankly, also go pretty big with the carrot for recitals, etc. I like to sneak videos of him playing and then listen to them when he’s around. . .I think it makes him feel special.
What is the parent’s role exactly?
- Ensure daily practice and occasionally help work through challenges
- My role was to encourage without making my child feel she was being pressured. It isn’t always easy, but if they love playing the piano they know they need to practice. A recital coming up is good incentive but practice every day is more important.
- I found it helpful to set a reasonable schedule that took into account other activities. For example, my son also plays saxophone and I needed to figure out a duration and schedule for both that gave him the practice needed without overwhelming him. I also asked my son what worked best for him – he said reminders but not “demands”. What he meant was me saying “Please practice your piano today” and give him a window. Not tell him, “Go practice right now”. For him, the agency is important.
- During the beginning level, one of us was always present to get them started. We would go over the lesson plan, homework and materials. This always helped in getting focused, then allow them to work through their homework. As years go by, it is important to make sure you set a regular time after school or before dinner to set up good habits.
- My role as a parent was guided by the Suzuki method where it was required to do some sort of practice each day. Early on, my daughter’s instructors were very explicit about what to practice – it might include a rhythm or tonal exercise, how to hold the bow or violin, and parts of a song, etc. Songs were practiced in different ways – listening, singing, playing with eyes closed, etc. I transferred some of these things when my son took piano, pointing out each thing that had to be done each day.
- Initially, I would sit with him and be physically present for his practices. Often not even saying or doing anything, but just being ‘there.’ It was also a way to make sure that the material was being covered. These days he prefers to practice alone, but I plant myself within listening distance to make sure that he’s practicing ‘well.’ I try to give him some agency – he gets a skip day of his choosing, and $1/practice to grease the wheels. And, I try to not beat myself up if we go through a period where practice falters.
How did you help your child through the “slumps” over the long term of lessons?
- Positive reinforcement for what doing well, keep regular practice schedule, listen to music together and identify what they like and role of piano in those songs
- As my child became a teenager it became harder to encourage regular practice, but nagging is unpleasant for both parent and child. I think in some ways it goes back to the motivation for learning piano. My child loved playing and loved her teacher (Amie!), so it made my job easier to encourage her through the temporary slumps. She would eventually come out of it. I think just talking to the child in a way to determine how they’re feeling about learning might be a start, without threatening, scolding or nagging. Maybe something else is going on in their life. Talking to the teacher can help—she might notice something that the parent didn’t.
- we allowed her to continue with lessons even when she wasn’t practicing much.
- As they progress, techniques and material become more difficult, and we would always focus on slowing down, being patient and setting goals for completing their current materials and tasks. It is amazing how taking small steps lead to accomplishing their goals!
- We were fortunate that we did not have too much “push-back” from him on daily practice. If he missed a day, he made that time up from what I remember. He enjoyed playing. Giving him positive feedback on his practicing kept him engaged….and we were usually always home when he practiced so we could give him feedback.
- I learned at some point that doing 5 minutes a day was more palatable that “forcing them” to play everything that was on the list for more time. I aimed for one minute for each year they were in age. For example, a 6 year old would practice for six minutes a day, 9 year old for 9 minutes, etc. It was pretty much a non-negotiable, like brushing one’s teeth or eating dinner.
- I let him know that everybody doing anything goes through slumps, and that it’s normal. We talk a fair amount about how learning isn’t a ‘straight line’ but more of a roller-coaster that trends ‘up.’ We also have a lot of conversations where I let him know that I understand that he doesn’t like it right now, and that I don’t like making him do things that aren’t ‘fun’, that this isn’t for me, and that I am making a bet that he will be happy later in life that he didn’t quit. If it gets really hard, skip the day, but each day is a fresh chance to practice.
Here is a fantastic podcast shared by Metropolitan Youth Symphony that gives great ideas to supporting music students as well:
Keys to Expression 